Tuesday 3 January 2012

We Loved to Play With our Mum and Dad


I I Seek refuge in Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD), from the Shaitan.
      Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD)’s name I begin, the Most Beneficent, the Most

'Abdullah ibn 'Umar (Radiyallaahu anhu) said, "The pleasure of the Lord lies in the pleasure of the parent.
The anger of the Lord lies in the anger of the parent."

  Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) Help me to be good to my parents.
Forbid that I should ever punish my parents, for my selfish satisfaction.
May I grant them all their wishes that are reasonable and have the courage?
Always to withhold a privilege which I know will do them harm.
Make me so fair and just,
So considerate and companionable to my parents, that they will have a genuine esteem for me.
Fit me to be loved and imitated by my children.

And we have enjoined on man goodness to his parents,
And if they contend with you that you should associate (others) with me,
Of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them, and to me is your return,
So I will inform you of what you did

Being a good to your parents is not about money, age or whether you and your partner are together.
 It's about love, respect.
Prophet (Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam) said that if you do good deeds with your parents it is worth Salah, Zakat, Fasting, Hajj, Umra and Jihad.
We shall obey our parents with a good behavior like show respect when your parents are talking.
It is our duty to look after their needs and comfort them with your respect.

We should talk to them with a low voice as respect.
When they are old we shall take care of them so that they will never feel neglected.
We should ask forgiveness to our parents when we commit a mistake knowingly or annoyingly.

-Chapter: 46, Verse: 15
And we have enjoined on man doing of good to his parents;
 With trouble did his mother bear him and with trouble did she bring him forth;
And the bearing of him and the weaning of him was thirty months;
Until when he attains his maturity and reaches forty years, he says:
 My lord! Grant me that i may give thanks for thy favor which thou hast bestowed on me and on my parents,
And that I may do well which pleases thee and do well to me in respect of my offspring; surely I turn to thee,
And surely I am of those who submit

He who gives his wealth to purify himself, and confers no favor on any man for recompense,
Only seeking the Face of his Lord the Most High; He shall surely be satisfied.  Qur'an 92.18-21
He who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully.
Each one must do as he has made up his mind, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) loves a cheerful giver.
And Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) is able to provide you with every blessing in abundance, so that you may always have enough of everything and may provide in abundance for every good work.
He scatters abroad, he gives to the poor; his righteousness endures forever.
He who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will supply and multiply your resources and increase the harvest of your righteousness.
You will be enriched in every way for great generosity.

Give not with the thought to gain, and be patient unto thy Lord.
. Qur'an 74.6-7

- Chapter: 29, Verse: 8
And we have enjoined on man goodness to his parents, and if they contend with you that you should associate (others) with me, of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them, to me is your return, so i will inform you of what you did

            Being a good to your parents.
Being a good to your parents is not about money, age or whether you and your partner are together.
 It's about love, respect.
Prophet Muhammad (saw) said that if you do good deeds with your parents it is worth Salah, Zakat, Fasting, Hajj, Umra and Jihad.
We shall obey our parents with a good behavior like show respect when your parents are talking.
It is our duty to look after their needs and comfort them with your respect.
We should talk to them with a low voice as respect.
When they are old we shall take care of them so that they will never feel neglected.
We should ask forgiveness to our parents when we commit a mistake knowingly or annoyingly.

Chapter: 4, Verse: 36
And serve Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) and do not associate any thing with him and be good to the parents and to the near of kin and the orphans and the needy and the neighbor of (your) kin and the alien neighbor, and the companion in a journey and the wayfarer and those whom your right hands possess;
Surely Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) does not love him who is proud, boastful;

Never argue with your parents or else Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) will be very angry and upset at you.
Whenever you do something do not let your parents feel upset and angry by our behavior towards them.
You will not understand the love that a parent has for a child until you yourself have you own child.
You will NEVER understand that it means to love somebody until you become a parent.
You will never understand it.
You never ever have a relationship; have a feeling for any human being, like you do for your son or daughter.

For those who are young:
 – Many of you, who are still young,
You have this idealistic concept of loving the opposite gender and getting married to them –
Ask anybody who’s gone beyond that stage.
Ask anybody who knows that truth – that type of love, it is a selfish love.
Why is it a selfish love?
Because you want something back in return. It is a love of give and take –
It is a love of fights along with good, there’s good and there’s bad.
Your most painful moments and your sweetest moment will be with your partner.

Chapter: 17, Verse: 23
And your lord Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) has commanded that you shall not serve (any) but him, and goodness to your parents.
 if either or both of them reach old age with you, say not to them (so much as) "ugh" nor chide them, and speak to them a generous word
When we give to one another, freely and without conditions, sharing our blessings with others and bearing each other's burdens, the giving multiplies and we receive far more than what was given.
Even when there is no immediate prospect of return, Heaven keeps accounts of giving, and in the end blessing will return to the giver, multiplied many fold.
We must give first; to expect to receive without having given is to violate the universal law.
On the other hand, giving in order to receive--with strings attached, with the intention of currying favor, or in order to make a name for oneself--is condemned

 Love of your parents?
When we were young, we loved to play with our Mum and Dad.
 When we grow up, many of us leave them and only come to them when we need something or when we are in trouble.
No matter what, parents are always there and give everything they could just to make us happy.
For Muslims follower of Islam, Every Year and Month and Day and Hour and Minute and Second is Mothers Day, Fathers Day and Parents Day.
Islam laid great emphasis on the rights of parents and the duties of children towards them.
According to Islamic teachings, to be obedient and to show kindness to parents has been enjoined in the Holy Quran in such a manner as to say that among the noble deeds,
To obey parents, treat them respectfully and to show kindness to them is next to worshipping Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD).
The Holy Quran says, "Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents.
Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor.
“Surah: - Al Isra (17:23)”.

Prophet (Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam):- the parents of a certain person are his Heaven or Hell.
What this means is that if a person obeys his parents, attends to their needs and keeps them happy and comfortable, he will attain Paradise.
On the other hand, if he is disrespectful and rude to them, offends them by ignoring their needs and feelings or causes them grief in any manner, his place shall be in Hell.
In modern times, a trend has arisen whereby when parents come to be seen as a liability because of old age and physical weakness.
They are then sent to 'old people's homes'.

But the stricture ordained by Islam makes it clear that shrugging off the responsibility of old parents serves as an invitation to Hell.
 Both the father and mother are equal when it comes to caring for them and providing them all possible physical comforts and mental peace.
The time that the parents need to be looked after most, is in their old age.
To serve them devotedly at that stage of their lives is the best way of pleasing Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD).
It is also one of the easiest ways of attaining Paradise. Abu Hurairah R.A., a companion of the holy Prophet (Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam), has said that:
 "A person is indeed disgraced, who does not earn Paradise by caring for his parents during the life time and old age of his/her parents".

Obeying one's parents and treating them with respect and affection is a great virtue and it serves as repentance for a person's sins.
Similarly, to ask Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) to have mercy on them after death is an act that brings them comfort in their graves.
It is the duty of sons and daughters to pray for the forgiveness of their parents after their death and treat their relatives and friends with due respect. In the Holy Quran, Muslims have been urged to pray for the salvation of their parents as shown in the following verse:
"And say, My Lord, Have mercy on both of them as they cared for me when I was little".

The holy Prophet (Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam), has said that to abuse one's parents is a major sin.
So much so that if a person abuses someone else's parents and that person, in retaliation,
Abuses his parents, then it is as though he himself has abused his parents.
On another occasion, when asked about the major sins, the holy he Prophet (Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam), replied,
"To associate someone with Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) is shirk, to disobey parents, to kill unlawfully, and to give false evidence".

         Love for your mother? :-
No painter's brush, nor poet's pen
In justice to her fame has ever reached half high enough to write a mother's name.

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born.  She never existed before. 
The woman existed, but the mother, never.  A mother is something absolutely new.
A man's work is from sun to sun, but a mother's work is never done.
The formative period for building character for eternity is in the nursery.
The mother is queen of that realm and sways a scepter more potent than that of kings or priests.
If the whole world were put into one scale, and my mother in the other, the whole world would kick the beam.
Motherhood is priced Of Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD), at price no man may dare to lessen or misunderstand.
Mother, the ribbons of your love is woven around my heart.

“Love for your father”?
"Touchy" subject...
 Some hate their dad, he lied, he stole money from his off spring, he is a cheat, etc. etc...
Why on earth did I alone get such a worst father: but i m so unlucky regarding this thing is. Love my mom and mom only etc...
It’s true it takes DNA to be a father but it takes a whole lot more to be a dad.
This is about love for your father in Islam.
The greatest gift I ever had
Came from Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD); I call him Dad!
"My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived and let me watch him do it."
A father is like a lighthouse. Standing tall above sea.
When the storms of life come crashing in.
The light from your father you'll see.
A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty.
A father’s sacrifice is just as big. It is the father who is the bread winner in the family;
He provides money for food, clothing, shelter, education, health and other necessities for the family.
It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.
It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was.

"Somebody said that no one can love a child the way a mother can. Somebody was never a father."

Every day, without wasting time, the father has to earn and provide-----
Be it by using his mental faculties, or thru physical labor such as working under the scorching heat of the sun, or endangering his life by going out in the stormy seas.
He goes through all these with perseverance and determination, solely for the purpose of providing the needs of the family.

The father also harbors hopes for his children similar to that of the mother, which means that his children succeed in becoming useful individuals.

This is unselfish love, unrestricted.
They want to give up everything you have to bring a smile on that child’s face. (That child is you)
They go to work, and they where motivated in their work to bring home some food to their children, to give an income to them –
 They will give up their life’s savings for their education. THAT is what you call love!
No human being feels that type of love for another, except a parent for the child.
And when you think about it, and when you experience parenthood, you understand the POWER of Allah’s creation,
For verily, I swear by Allah, if the parents did not have this love for this child, no child could live on the face of this earth.

What is it that your parents really wants to have, is that against the Noble Qur'an and Authentic Sunnah?
 IF not my friend then there is a Serious Problem and you need to correct IMMEDIATELY.

A child is given to you.
A child will be handed over to you, and you will be told, this is your baby, this is your child, you are responsible for it,
 You have to take care of it.
This child will take up most of your time, most of your energy, most of your wealth,
Your living will become dependant upon this child, your entire life will change because of this child.
The amount of sacrifice you must do cannot be measure in words, cannot be measured in figures, and cannot be measured in quantities.
Those who have children and are growing up with them, they know what I’m talking about –
And yet you have not experienced everything, because your children are still growing up with you.

Your parents have done that for you.
Your parents have done that for you, and you don’t even realize it,
Because when you become an adult, you “know it all,
” you’re the one who thinks they know better than their parents; you’re the one who wants to leave the nest and become independent.
And you don’t realize that a mother’s love, a father’s love – once you leave that nest, it will never by the same.
 Once that parent goes away as well, you will never have that opportunity again.

You could help your parents by so many ways. But the one that gives you the most sawaab impresses Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD)
And the best one is to be obedient and have respect for them.
That’s why I talked about those two the most. I’m not saying other stuff is bad and only does that stuff.
What I am saying is that other ones are good but those two are the best ones.

Make dua for them in your prayers so you thank Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) for your parents.
The Prophet (Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam) said that whoever pleases their parents pleases
Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala and whoever angers their parents angers Allah subhanahu WA Ta’aala. So be good to your parents.

Oh Muslims, this is the beauty of the cycle of life – that Allah ‘azza wa jel blesses all of us with parents.
 And then He blesses some of us with children, and those children grow up, and some of us are still alive.
Some of us have our parents alive when we grow up – that’s why Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) says in the Qur’an:
“If one or both of them are alive, take care of them” [17:23], because some of us don’t have that luxury.

One of the companions, famous companions, and his mother passed away, and he was crying… greatly.
So some of the other sahabas tried to console him, and they said: it’s alright, she is in Jannah InshaAllah, and she’s forgiven.
They tried to console him. And he said, “Do you think I’m crying because she died?
Of course I’m sad because she died, that’s not why I’m crying.”

Notice how the sahabas view things and how we view them.
He said: “I am crying because my door to Jannah has been shut!
And I don’t know if I got in or not.” She was my door to Jannah!
That’s why I’m crying. My door to Jannah has been shut.
 I don’t know – was I a good enough son?!
 I don’t know – did I do what I needed to do?! There’s no other way for me except through her.

And he quoted, or he paraphrased an authentic hadith of the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam when he said:
That the parent: is the LARGEST door to paradise; the parents are the middle door to paradise, the parent is the MAIN door to paradise.

So the Sahabas understood this. The death of a parent was not just a personal loss.
 It was a religious and spiritual loss as well: I don’t know whether I made it in or not…

One-day three people were stuck in a cave with a big stone in the way to get out.
They said let’s make dua and tell the best thing we did in our dua then Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) will get us out of the cave.
Two people said their best deed they had done and nothing happened.
So the third person said the best deed he had done.
He said that the best thing I did was when I used to bring milk for my parents and children everyday.
 But one day he brought only some milk. So he gave the milk to his parents and not to his children.
He then massaged his parent’s feet and took care of them.
 Then he made dua. Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) heard that deed and moved the big rock out of the way and the three people went out of the cave.
So if you help your parents like how this man did you could get out of big troubles like this one and other big ones.
A man came to Ibn Abbas, and he said: I have done this and I have done that,
I have done this and I have done that.
He listed a whole long list of sins, and he had just repented and come back to Islam.
 He said, “What can I do now?” Ibn Abbas said, “Are one of your parents alive?
” He said, “Yes, my mother is alive.” Ibn Abbas said: “Go stick to her – go at her feet” –
Go service here – go give everything you have to her –
“Because I know of no other deed that forgives the amounts of sins that serving your parents does.
” No deed can take that place of cleansing an entire life of evil, cleansing an entire lifetime of disease, than being good to your parents.
Go to her, and give you entire body and soul to her – bring to her that happiness and joy, and that’s your only hope that I can see for you.
And he’s basing this as well on many hadith of the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam.

A man came to the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam, and he said, “Ya Rasool Allah” – this hadith is in Bukhari –
“Ya Rasool Allah, I have come from Yemen” – the furthest corners of Arabia, nothing further than Yemen –
 “I have come from Yemen, in order to be with you!”
He has now become a Sahabi – he has elevated his rank in history by visiting the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam!
 “In order to be with you, and do jihad behind you. And in order to do so, I had to leave my parents crying at my loss and departure.”

He’s trying to boast, he’s trying to brag, he’s trying to show his status: I want to do this, and I even left my parents crying, in order to come here.

The Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam asked him: “Do you want Jannah?
” Meaning: is that your goal? You want the pleasure of Allah?
He said: “Yes.” The Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam said:
 “In that case, go back to them now, GO BACK TO THEM and make them laugh, just like you left them cry.”

Meaning: you want Jannah and you have done this? You want Jannah and your own parents are not happy with you?
 You will not be able to earn Jannah in any other way!
Listen to me, this man left everything to come to the Prophet of Allah salla Allahu alayhi wasallam,
He left everything to do jihad behind the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam,
And the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam asked: do you want Jannah?
Go back to your parents, and be with them! Make them laugh like you have made them cry!

Do you understand the rights of the parents?
Do you understand the Prophet of Allah is saying: do you really want Jannah and you’re coming to me?
You’re coming to me to do jihad with me, and your own parents need you?
He told that man to go back to his parents, and make them laugh like he had made them cry.

Oh Muslims, the status of parents is something that transcends even religion.
Generally speaking; generally speaking, if a man or a woman is abusive to Islam, cursing Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) and His Messenger, we leave him alone
 – We don’t associate with him. There’s only one exception, and that exception is the parent. That exception is the parent.

Allah ‘azza WA jel says: even if your parents try to force you to idolatry,

They’re forcing you – they’re physically trying to shove you down in front of an idol
 – Emotional blackmail, spiritual blackmail, whatever they’re doing – they’re doing jihad against you, to do shirk…

Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) says:

“Don’t listen to them.” You can’t contravene the first principal which is la illah illa Allah, BUT:


- “In this world” – leave their affair to Allah, “in this world, you must be good to them” (31:15) -

“Ma’roof”: be kind and just to them.

EVEN parents who are idol worshippers, who are mushriks, trying to force you to leave Islam,
 You still don’t have the right to be rude to them.
 If you can’t be rude to someone like that, then brothers and sisters, let us look at our own lives.
When have we been rude to our mothers and fathers? When they show us love?

Chapter: 6, Verse: 151
Say: come i will recite what your lord has forbidden to you-- (remember) that you do not associate anything with him and show kindness to your parents, and do not slay your children for (fear of) poverty-- we provide for you and for them--
and do not draw nigh to indecencies, those of them which are apparent and those which are concealed, and do not kill the soul which Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) has forbidden except for the requirements of justice; this he has enjoined you with that you may understand

The love that your mother and father have for you is a love you will never understand until you become a parent and are at that age.
And the feeling that you have of being stifled with rules and regulations – that feeling is a feeling that you will miss –
 You will miss when you leave your parents’ nest. And you will be even stricter with your children when your time comes.

Abu Huraira (Radiyallaahu anhu) reported that he heard the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, say, "No human child has ever spoken in the cradle except for 'Isa ibn Maryam, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and the companion of Juraj’s." Abu Huraira (Radiyallaahu anhu) asked, "Prophet of Allah, who was the companion of Juraj’s?" The Prophet replied, "Juraj’s was a monk who lived in a hermitage. There was a cowherd who used to come to the foot of his hermitage and a woman from the village used to come to the cowherd.

"One day his mother came while he was praying and called out, 'Juraj’s!' He asked himself, 'My mother or my prayer?' He concluded that he should prefer the prayer. She shouted to him a second time and he again asked himself, 'My mother or my prayer?' He thought that he should prefer the prayer. She shouted a third time and yet again he asked himself, 'My mother or my prayer?' He again concluded that he should prefer the prayer. When he did not answer her, she said, 'Juraj’s, May Allah not let you die until you have looked at the faces of the beautiful women.' Then she left.

"Then the village woman was brought before the king after she had given birth to a child. He asked, 'Whose is it?' 'Juraj's,' she replied. He asked, 'The man in the hermitage?' 'Yes,' she answered. He ordered, 'Destroy his hermitage and bring him to me.' They hacked at his hermitage with axes until it collapsed. They bound his hand to his neck with a rope and took him along to the king. When he passed by the beautiful women, he saw them and smiled. They were looking at him along with the people.

"The king asked, 'Do you know what this woman claims?' 'What does she claim?' he asked. He replied, 'She claims that you are the father of her child.' He asked her, 'Where is the child?' They replied, 'It is in her room.' He went to the child and said, 'Who is your father?' 'The cowherd,' he replied. The king said, 'Shall we build your hermitage out of gold?' 'No,' he replied. He asked, 'Of silver?' 'No,' he replied. The king asked, 'What shall we build it with?' He said, 'Put it back the way you found it.' Then the king asked, 'What made you smile.' 'Something I recognized,' he replied, 'the supplication of my mother overtook me.' Then he told him about it."
Don’t fool yourselves.
You don’t understand the meaning of your parents’ love for you.
 Every rule and regulation they put upon you is because of their love for you – they want what is best for you.
Every sing rule and regulation that they have upon you – every requirement, every desire – it is a desire for you, and not against you.
You won’t realize it now.
 These are only going to be words to you.
But when you have your own child, and you have raised that child in front of your eyes,
And the child becomes a young man or a young woman,
You will be even stricter upon that child than your parents were with you.
 Why Because of living in this society.
 You know what it means to be in this world.
 You know the ins and outs. Therefore, you’re going to be even more protective than your parents were.

Realize this, and pay heed to it. And understand that they only do this out of love for you.

And understand another part, which is ever more profound.
 And many of you will not fully comprehend it until the age comes.
And that is: no matter what you think of your parents, in terms of their knowledge of this world,
In terms of their knowledge of your culture, or their knowledge of civilization –
No matter how you look down at them because of whatever they have or haven’t done –
They have one thing that you don’t have. And that is experience – wisdom – age.
Experience and wisdom is not taught in a book. You don’t learn it by studying. It comes by living through life.

And you as a 17/18 year old kid – you don’t know what experience is; you don’t know what wisdom is.
Your mother and father have gone through life; they know what it means to live.
Even if they speak with a different accent, even if they do things that to you look backwards,
They are more knowledgeable than you of the mechanisms of human life.
They understand emotions better than you.
They know what it means to live amongst humans, because they have done it, and you haven’t -

And a time will come – trust you me – a time will come when you will regret that you didn’t take their advice more.
Right now, for many of you who are young, you trivialize their advice.
You think, my parents don’t know anything. As a 17/18 year old, you know everything, and they, at 60, 80, they know nothing.
A time will come when you would wish that your parents were still alive, so you can call them up and get their advice.
A time will come when you will realize: my parents did indeed know this best.

And this is something that, you should pray to Allah that that time comes when you are still alive.
Because it is possible – it is the Sunnah of Allah that children grow up, and their parents die before them –
This is the Sunnah of Allah, the general rule.

We should do our best to make sure, that when our parents die,
Whenever that happens – and we ask Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) to give all of us a long life, we should try and strive,
That when they leave this world, they leave this world pleased with us, content with us,
Happy with us, knowing that we have done everything we can for them.

Because it is possible a parent will die…
And you haven’t done your job –
You haven’t done justice.
And when that happens, you can never return the clock.
You can never bring them back.
And you will live the rest of your life in regret and remorse, Now that this door of Jannah has been shut, and you don’t know whether you have entered it or not.

What can we do, to our parents?
 What can we do for them?
What can we do to make them happy?
 If your parents are alive, first and foremost thank Allah ‘azza wa jel for this opportunity.
 Thank Him; rejoice that there is still chance and hope!
THANK Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) that Almighty Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD)has blessed you to be an adult while your parents are still alive.
Do for them everything that is humanly possible.

If you read all day Salah, Qur’an or anything
And if somebody takes care of their parents the one who is taking care of their parents is getting more sawaab.
You can never be an Imam or Sheikh if you were bad to your parents that are haram in Islam.
Our deeds shall be the pleasure of our parents and of Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala.

If you were good to your parents and when you grow up your kids will be good to you.
If you were bad to your parents and when you grow up your kids will be bad to you.
So if you were good to them it’s good for you too not only your parents.
Financially: Many of us think that financially, our wives or children take precedent – no!
Islamic ally speaking, it is number one: the mother and father; number two: the wife and kids.
We have to take care of ALL – it is our obligation as men, we have to take care of a lot of people,
But number one on that list is mother and father, –
And that is why, when a man came to the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam complaining,
“Oh ya Rasool Allah, my father takes this, my father takes that,” complaining that his father would take some things of his possession.
After ALL that the father has done for this son, after ALL the money and time and effort and sweat,
 This man came and complained that he took bits and pieces – he took trinkets from his wealth? And he’s complaining,
“My father takes money without asking me?”
Do you know the response of the Rasool salla Allahu alayhi wasallam? “You and your wealth – all of it – belong to your father.”
 You’re now getting angry that he’s taken a hundred pounds? Or thousand pounds? After ALL that he’s done?
ALL that you own belongs to your father – you and ALL of your possessions. “Anta wa Maal uka li abeek.
” Who are you now to come and complain that he takes a little bit from you?

And from this, scholars of fiqh have derived many, many rulings: that the father owns the property of the son, some of the fuqaha’ said.
And others disagreed with this. The point being, from this, they took many rulings of fiqh.

If they’re alive, financially, number one – it is not possible for you to eat a full meal, and your parents don’t have that.
Take care of them, in any way possible. Spiritually. Make du’aa for them.
Do what you can to show your love to them. If they are still with you, (Alhamdullilah).
If they’re in another country, make sure they are taken care of.
 Calling them up – simple phone call – does not underestimate the joy that you will bring your mother by calling her up on the phone.
Do not underestimate that. The love and happiness she will feel talking to her regularly.
 Do not underestimate the power of a conversation, and being in touch. Make sure that you do anything -

Every one of us comes from a culture and civilization –
 There are things that we do in that culture, to show respect to them –
Do those things. It is a part of your religion (Islam) – it is a part of your duty to Allah, that you do this.

But if it so happens that they are no longer with you –
If you Allah ‘azza wa jel has willed that they have moved on to the next life – then still, there are things that can be done.

First and foremost: du’aa. Make Dua’s for them.
 Du’aa that Allah forgives them, raises their ranks, blesses them.
Abu Huraira R.A. said, "The dead person can be raised a degree after his death. He said, 'My Lord how is this?'
He was told, 'your child can ask for forgiveness for you.'"

The Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam told us, that of the best thing we can do when somebody dies is to make du’aa for them –
When the parent dies, we make du’aa for them.
Allah commands us in the Qur’an: make du’aa for them.

One of the sahabas, when his father died, he said: for one year, I could not think of anything to make du’aa, except for my father.
ONE WHOLE YEAR, every time I raised my hand, all I could do was make du’aa for him.
This is a part of being a good son. Make du’aa for them.
Another thing you can do: give charity on their behalf. Give money –
And you say, “Oh Allah, may the reward of this go to my mother and father.” Go for Hajj and Umrah.
 “May the reward of this go to my mother and father?” Sacrifice an ‘udhiya.
“May the reward of this go to my mother and father?” You do what you can, financially,
And you expect the reward to go to your parents, and not to yourself.

Also, you can visit their relatives, and visit their friends that you used to visit when they were alive.
 You visit their circle of friends that you used to visit. And you do what you can, to bring about their memory, in that sense.
Because when you go to their gatherings – your parent’s relatives, your parent’s friends – what will happen?
The topic of conversation will always be your mother and father.
And when that brings about, you will remember them with good, and you will pray for them.

So this, too, is part of being a dutiful son/Daughter.
Basically, brothers and sisters, do what you can before it is too late.
Do what you can, ALL that you can do, and there is no good deed after the worship of Allah that is more beloved than being good to the parent.

Taysala ibn Mayas said, "I was with the Najadites [Kharijites] when I committed wrong actions which I supposed were major wrong actions.
 I mentioned that to Ibn 'Umar (Radiyallaahu anhu). He inquired, 'What are they?" I replied, 'Such-and-such.' He stated,
'These are not major wrong actions.
There are nine major wrong actions.
They are: associating others with Allah, killing someone, desertion from the army when it is advancing, slandering a chaste woman, Usury, consuming an orphan's property, heresy in the mosque, scoffing, and causing one's parents to weep through disobedience.
‘Ibn 'Umar R.A. then said to me, 'Do you wish to separate yourself from the Fire? Do you want to enter the Fire?'
‘By Allah! Yes!' I replied. He asked, 'Are your parents still alive?' I replied, 'My mother is.' He said,
'By Allah, if you speak gently to her and feed her, then you will enter the Garden as long as you avoid the major wrong actions.'"

Ibn 'Abbas mentioned the words of the Almighty, "When one or both of them reach old age with you, do not say
'Ugh!' to them out of irritation and do not be harsh with them but speak to them with gentleness and generosity.
Take them under your wing, out of mercy, with due humility and say:
 'Lord, show mercy to them as they did in looking after me when I was small." (17:23-24) He said,
 "This was abrogated in Surat at-Tawba: 'It is not right for the Prophet
and those who have iman to ask forgiveness for the mushrikeen even if they are close relatives after it has become clear to them that they are the Companions of the Blazing Fire.' (9:113)"

 Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam: When a man came to him, wanted to do well,
The Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam asked, “Is your mother alive?” He said: “Yes.
” The Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam said: go to her, and stick to her feet (an Arabic expression, meaning: submit yourself to her),
Because at her feet is Jannah.” Jannah is around her feet. That’s what the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam said. The Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam:
Where, he was climbing up the minbar, and when he got up to the last minbar [step?], he said, “Ameen.
” And, when he said Ameen, the Sahabi asked him,
 “Why are you saying Ameen?"
” He said: Jibraeel A.S. came to me and said,
“Make du’aa that any man who finds his parents alive at an old age,
And still does not manage to get his sins forgiven, make du’aa that he is never forgiven.
” Meaning, there is no hope for the man who reaches old age with his parents,
 And yet does not gain the forgiveness of Allah.
 If you can’t be a good son/daughter, you cannot be a good Muslim. It’s that simple.

Muslims should adhere to their own religion and avoid following non-Muslim traditions.
Mothers and fathers should be loved, respected, obeyed and appreciated every day, with no need to single out special days to honor them.

In the light of the Holy Quran and holy Prophet's sayings,
one can understand that the respect for parents occupies a special place in the moral and social teachings of Islam. -

Pray and do Dhikr in good times and tense times, and hold tight to the rope of Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) at all times.
Try to give up some dunya and replace with Dhikr and Salat, InshaAllah it will help.
Alhamdullilah! Sabr is the secret door to Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD)’s presence.
It is the code that tells Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) that we truly submit to His will, whatever it may be.
May Allah Subhanawataala grant us what is best in this world and the next!
Action speaks louder then words my friend’s practice Islam the way of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam) did.
 May Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) help us to do that which He loves and which pleases Him?
May Allah Subhanahu WA Ta’aala (GOD) make our efforts sincere and keep us all on the straight path...........
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         P.S.: "Have fun praying don’t forget to make dua for me...

2 comments:

Zenmawon said...

Alhamdulillah, thanks for all these useful words.

fwiilson said...

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